"Everytime I see your face, everytime you look my way, it’s like it all falls into place. Everything feels right."
It's somewhat amazing to me how quickly I can plummet from complete happiness. In the short matter of an hour I've been from ecstaticly happy, to ticked off, to the brink of tears, to angry once more. Now I'm just depressed.
I have no good reason to be depressed. I feel like one of those whiny spoiled girls who don't appreciate what they have. Still, I can't stop the feelings from coming.
The world is dropping in my eyes. I just delivered my dog from kids who were tossing a ball back around, laughing at my dog as she pulled at her lead.
My mom has sentenced me to a day's worth of work. I have to finish the dishes, sweep the kitchen floor, clean my room, vacuum all carpets, general cleaning around the house. I also have to find time to watch a two hour movie that we rented and I still haven't had a chance to watch. Why all the work? My mom's being bitchy because it's her time of the month.
Which of course, sends me into hysterics because I can't get in a proper fight with my mom without breaking into tears. Not because I'm a wimp mind you, I just hate being angry at my mom. It doesn't change the fact that I am angry, it just means I'm screaming through tears.
I now have to listen to my little sister sing. In my truck. Mutilating the bands I love. The songs she doesn't know the words to. Because my mom got pissed off at me for telling her one too many times to stop. Ignoring the fact that my sister isn't listening to me, when what I say makes sense. I don't sing along to songs I don't know. Then again, I actually know what harmony means and how to harmonize. There is nothing worse than hearing a perfect high pitched note coming against an out of tune low one. And she keeps doing it. She's not even saying the words, because she doesn't know them. She moves her lips in a set of confused rapid movements that leave her just making noise, or holding out notes that don't even exist. She doesn't actually form words. She doesn't know the songs. Worse, she pretends to know the songs. She says that it was in a movie or on the radio, when I can guarantee they haven't been. And I tell her this. My mom agrees, but she still lets my sister sing. I even have to listen to her when I'm not singing. When I'm quietly listening to the voice and ever present guitar. Except now it's ruined. One of my great loves is singing in my truck. Where no one hears me but family or close friends. And she ruins it.
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say any of this. I meant to stop writing at the fact that I was depressed. Now I do sound like a whiny spoiled brat.
I'm going to go read Ryo's e-mail. That will probably cheer me up. ANd I might bribe my sister. Or threaten her.
Light and happy.
Dark and dreary.
I have no good reason to be depressed. I feel like one of those whiny spoiled girls who don't appreciate what they have. Still, I can't stop the feelings from coming.
The world is dropping in my eyes. I just delivered my dog from kids who were tossing a ball back around, laughing at my dog as she pulled at her lead.
My mom has sentenced me to a day's worth of work. I have to finish the dishes, sweep the kitchen floor, clean my room, vacuum all carpets, general cleaning around the house. I also have to find time to watch a two hour movie that we rented and I still haven't had a chance to watch. Why all the work? My mom's being bitchy because it's her time of the month.
Which of course, sends me into hysterics because I can't get in a proper fight with my mom without breaking into tears. Not because I'm a wimp mind you, I just hate being angry at my mom. It doesn't change the fact that I am angry, it just means I'm screaming through tears.
I now have to listen to my little sister sing. In my truck. Mutilating the bands I love. The songs she doesn't know the words to. Because my mom got pissed off at me for telling her one too many times to stop. Ignoring the fact that my sister isn't listening to me, when what I say makes sense. I don't sing along to songs I don't know. Then again, I actually know what harmony means and how to harmonize. There is nothing worse than hearing a perfect high pitched note coming against an out of tune low one. And she keeps doing it. She's not even saying the words, because she doesn't know them. She moves her lips in a set of confused rapid movements that leave her just making noise, or holding out notes that don't even exist. She doesn't actually form words. She doesn't know the songs. Worse, she pretends to know the songs. She says that it was in a movie or on the radio, when I can guarantee they haven't been. And I tell her this. My mom agrees, but she still lets my sister sing. I even have to listen to her when I'm not singing. When I'm quietly listening to the voice and ever present guitar. Except now it's ruined. One of my great loves is singing in my truck. Where no one hears me but family or close friends. And she ruins it.
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say any of this. I meant to stop writing at the fact that I was depressed. Now I do sound like a whiny spoiled brat.
I'm going to go read Ryo's e-mail. That will probably cheer me up. ANd I might bribe my sister. Or threaten her.
Light and happy.
Dark and dreary.
posted by Tiffany at 1:06 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home